Labels: birds nest, earthworm
snorfed at
9:46 PM
Today was fun! Playing soccer with the guys from 4B felt rather nostalgic. It would have been better if the rest of the guys turned up, but they had school stuff and such. Playing at this really ulu place called Cages at Kallang near the stadium was really cool. Imagine indoor soccer court, with synthetic grass, and fan, and blasting music. Kinda like playing fifa. LOL.
Then the road flooded. And flooded. And it poured. And flooded into the building. So, we decided to zhao from that place. Totally yucks man, flood until above ankle. You couldnt really make out where the drain was, where the pavement ended and the road started. So, Shao Jie fell in leaving like his head above the pavement. Oh, and his phone died. Kenneth fell in too, and got a really yucky cut(s). We ran to the KFC near the stadium and their Manager was nice enough to make a makeshift bandage for him. Obviously after lunch, we took a cab and he went to the doctor's. $60. I think the clinic ripped him off. Madness.
These were taken during our first break. As you can see, I'm super out of shape and thus the shaky hands.
Oh yeah, did I mention? As it rained, it flooded into the room. Pictures of the court and the flooded room. I think slippers were floating around like tiny boats and outside the black trashbin, the big kind, was floating around too. Just didnt manage to shoot that.
and more pictures..either I was bored or trying to be arty farty (and failed) or taking pics of the cat eating my chicken bones.
Arty farty..
and the cat...
I'm tired..I'll be back tomorrow with pics from Tsz shan's bbq..
snorfed at
8:54 PM
The weird event caused by the bird's nest outside my mom's room, behind the air-con compressor.
I was lying on the floor, nonchalently chatting with my mom who was on the bed. Then a scream erupted from her gaping mouth!
Ahhh!! There was an earthworm beside my head!
So I picked it up and threw it out of the window.
The end.
Stupid mother bird. Next time feed your chicks properly and don't let the earthworms escape and crawl into the house. On hindsight, I should have dumped the worm into the nest hor? Too late.
snorfed at
7:12 PM
I'm insecure. It's been some time since the start of the A levels. There are only 3 papers left to do. 3. How are those going to help me?
Everynight for awhile now, I lie thinking about the moment I receive my results slip next year. In my army uniform and my botak head, surrounded by happy faces with all of them holding on to wonderful results and I wonder to myself,
"Did I just waste 2 years of my life? Oh no! What am I to do? Is it over? Am I going to retake and do subjects like GP and Econs which I've either not done before or never at all? Or am I going to poly after NS? What would my family say? Should I go home?..."
It's easy to envision such scenes appearing over and over again, akin to a jumpy video set on loop. I can see it so clearly, my friends coming over asking, "How did you do?". Then, placing their hands on my shoulder saying that its not that bad.
I could just slump in a corner of the hall until a teacher walks over to give advice, or I could walk out of the hall, turn off my mobile phone, and roll under a rock to rot. Yet, who is to blame?
I am to blame for what has happened. It only dawned upon me the enormity of the examinations that I am taking after my Mathematics Paper 2. It was too late for Math. I made careless errors for Chem. My mini thesis or aka Independent Study was a mess. I mean, it all seemed so provincial and fleeting. A brief moment in time that felt like a flash. Immaterial and barely existing.
To say the least, the past two years felt empty and hollow as if something were missing. The corporeal body of my jc life, my achievements (or lack thereof) lacking in spirit. Drained, almost. I lacked the foresight to see beyond what was infrontof me. Those the leadership positions which I gave up on before even trying, those incomplete or copied assignments, those lectures I spent sleeping through. They meant something. Those had value, weight, existence.
I gradually discovered I had lost the music to my soul. The key to my spirit. In the confines of my school, my room, my mind, I gave up on the things that should have mattered. After so many failures, nothing mattered anymore. What's another U? What's another failed performance? Nothing affected me. Indifference was my armour, indifference was the weight which sank me to the bottom of the cesspool of despair which I didn't even notice.
So what if I had achievements? Those tiny childish moments? The highlight of my life? To say that I peaked in secondary school? Pathetic. I have nothing to be proud about, nothing so show that I made an impact on this world. This is not Fatalistic. No! This is an Awakening.
I end this here. I leave in a bid to calm my mind with mental exercise.
P.S. I think I'm dead. Maybe.
snorfed at
10:41 PM
work hard, mug hard. worth it
snorfed at
8:10 PM
yeah, I'm still mad. Or in the eternal words of phira, "siao". Haha. I'm awake at this unearthly hour, with KI to do and yet I'm stoning. Maybe I'll start at 2.15am.
snorfed at
1:49 AM
Disclaimer! Don't ask me if I'm not okay or sumthing. I'm totally fine. Just in a contemplative mood.
I think I'm mad. Or maybe I'm just needing a little quite time, but I want to like stay up tonight, staring up into the starless night sky from my sofa under the window, looking past the glare of the flourescent light streaming from the stairwells of the opposite block.
I'm long overdue for silent contemplation and reflection. When was the last time I even sat on the sofa to think. Ok, given that the sofa was covered with stuff like files and books and papers, but still, I wouldn't have done it either. Just sitting and thinking about what I'm going to do with the next month, or so, of my life and how I'm ever going to accomplish what I can and want to. Act emo a bit, even though there's nothing emotional about thinking.
Thinking is such an exercise in rationality. Don't mind me if I go all philosophical and whimsical (is that how you spell it?) all of a sudden. I'm into one of my rare moods when I think more than I speak. Just calm and peaceful but not in the mood to do some work. I want to feel like I'm the only person around thats awake at that witching hour.
Do you feel like that sometimes? Just a sudden urge to go somewhere quite and relaxing to do some thinking? Or to just drop everything that you are doing and just teleport to somewhere far far away, away from the hustle and bustle of your life? To be alone, in a place of beauty? Man, I should go invent such a device. Haha.
Events are unfolding and life is rolling on. I like watching as a spectator as stuff happens. I also like to be part of that play. Maybe tomorrow I should go down to the beach to watch the sunrise then go to school? Mad. I must be mad, and I'll probably not do it anyway.
What do you do when you blow a balloon and it bursts? You get a new balloon and inflate it again. If life were so simple, then everyone would be bursting balloons, wouldn't they? Oooh, linguistics. Haha. A day in the life of a tissue box. You get lighter and lighter, knowing that one day, when your tissues run out, you'll be thrown out. Sad, isn't it?
Mad, just plain mad. I like thinking. Makes me feel smart. So what if there were a evil higher entity deluding me? So what if I were a brain in a vat with scientists prodding me, sending electrical impluses through me? I think. Even if what I think is faux, I'm thinking. I like math. Makes me think.
Tick tock, goes the clock on my wall. Tick tock, the time drips away. Am I wasting my time thinking? We'll see. Tomorrow comes around, will I be around? Or will I just be round? I think we all know the answer deep in our hearts.
Round. Haha.
snorfed at
11:16 PM